Moving in with your significant other is a huge relationship milestone. It’s also a decision that will affect nearly every aspect of your daily life.
While moving in together is certainly an exciting, positive step, it’s more than just a permanent sleepover with your best friend. Many aspects of your relationship and your daily life will change while living with your significant other, so it’s not a decision to take lightly.
Your significant other might have habits, preferences and opinions you’re blissfully unaware of before co-habitating. Here’s what to consider before moving in with your partner.
What You Should Know Before Getting an Apartment With Your Significant Other
Cover All the Money Questions
If you’re seriously considering moving in with your partner, then you need to have this difficult conversation. It’s crucial to talk finances before sharing a home. Even if you don’t combine bank accounts, you’re still beginning a shared money-management journey.
Start by agreeing on a budget. Everything needs to be discussed, from major items like who’s covering the security deposit, who’s setting up and paying for utilities and how you’re splitting rent, to the more minute details such as who’s buying the sofa and who pays for the toiletries.
This is important because one person might prioritize a luxury living experience while the other might care more about pinching pennies to save for a car, vacation or furniture. This is important insight to have before living with your significant other.
Money is a common source of arguments between couples. So, before you make the commitment to live together, be sure you agree about who will be covering which parts of your apartment living budget.
Discuss Changes in Relationship Status
Here’s another conversation that might get a little uncomfortable. What happens if things don’t work out? The last thing on your mind before moving in with your significant other is a breakup. But because you’ll be signing a binding, legal document, it’s important to know what the process looks like if circumstances change down the road.
Just bring the conversation up so neither person is blindsided down the road. If it makes you more comfortable, consider a short-term lease option and continue to renew it on a 6-month basis.
Cover Chores
Don’t go into a new living situation, even with someone you love and adore, assuming you’ll split chores evenly! Agree on expectations and discuss preferences in advance. This will set you up for success down the road. These details are exactly what to know before moving in with your partner.
Talk about how often you clean your home now and what your standard of cleanliness is for your new apartment. Cover who cooks, who washes up after dinner or if you’ll fend for yourselves. Do you take the garbage out every night, or only when it’s full? Are you sharing groceries? If so, who shops?
Figure out your own specific preferences, listen to your partner’s and come up with a plan that satisfies you both. If you divide the labor on the ultimate apartment cleaning checklist so you’re feeling the equal burden of responsibilities, you’ll increase the chances of more anniversary celebrations down the road.
Talk About Pet Peeves
When figuring out what to know before moving in with your significant other, it’s helpful to be clear about the details you want them to know about you. What gets under your skin and drives you crazy? What makes you angry? How do you respond when you’re annoyed or frustrated? Be honest about habits or actions that don’t work for and how you respond to them. There’s no sense in hiding these things. Your significant other is going to find out your pet peeves after moving in together whether you want them to or not!
If having people over late at night bothers you, talk about this before moving in with your partner. If putting clothes in the laundry basket instead of the floor is non-negotiable, say so. If you hate dishes being left in the sink, the bed left unmade, a messy bathroom counter or anything else, bring it up now! Figure out where you are willing to compromise and if you’re willing to live with this person’s quirks and habits.
What’s the Point of Moving in With Your Partner?
This is a discussion many couples neglect. It’s easy to move in together out of convenience or for financial reasons. However, it’s important to make sure you’re both on the same page here.
If one of you wants to make this change because they want to take the relationship to the next level and the other is in it because they’ll save some money, there might be concerns down the road. Again, this is a potentially difficult conversation, but it’s one that will save you time, energy and potential heartache in the future.
Here are some of the reasons couples decide to move in together. Consider these carefully before making your decision.
- Convenience. Driving back and forth to your partner’s apartment takes a lot of time, particularly if they live on the other side of town. Moving in together makes it easier to enjoy each other’s company.
- Finances. Moving in together will help both of you save money and maybe even be to afford a nicer apartment than if you rented alone. However, this shouldn’t be the only reason you’re moving in together.
- Commitment. Moving in together is a huge step in any relationship. For many couples, it reaffirms and strengthens their commitment to each other.
- Efficiency. Things like chores and decorating are often easier to handle with another person — as long as you truly split them evenly.
Tips for Moving in With a Significant Other
While moving in with your partner is a huge change, there are many things you can do to make the process easier and more enjoyable for both of you. Here are our top tips for moving in with a significant other.
Make Good Communication a Habit
Communicating well is key for any relationship, but it’s particularly important when you’re living together. The last thing you want is for resentment to build over small things like dirty dishes or noise from the TV. Check in with each other regularly to discuss what is and isn’t working and to actively problem solve together. Proactive communication can help stop fights before they happen.
Take Time for Yourself
Even though you’re living with your significant other, it’s still important to maintain your identity. Schedule time to participate in your own hobbies, meet up with friends separately or just relax by yourself, particularly when you’re feeling overwhelmed. Alone time now and then will help you recharge and be a better partner.
Find Fair Compromises
You’re not going to agree on everything while living together, so compromise is key. Let go of the desire to ‘win’ every argument and instead, search for compromises that will make you both happy.
For example, if you’re struggling to agree on furniture options, have one partner buy a couch and the other partner buy shelves or a coffee table rather than buying a matching set. This ensures both of your styles are reflected and help the apartment feel like home for everyone.
Keep the Spark Alive With Date Nights
When you’re living together, it’s easy to fall into a routine and forget to connect with your partner. To prevent this, make sure you’re still scheduling regular date nights. Whether it’s a night out at a fancy restaurant or just a picnic at your local park, date nights help keep the romance alive.
Ready to Move in Together?
At Southern Management, you’ll see why living with your significant other doesn’t need to be expensive or stressful. We understand that storage space can be just as important as square footage when combining two households into one. Many of our communities and floor plans incorporate additional space and have on-site storage.
Ready to level-up your relationship status? Contact us online.